Stars Fading But I Linger On Dear

When I was a child my mother, my sweet mother, used to sing me to sleep. Her favorite was “Dream a Little Dream of Me” by the Mamas and the Papas. The whistling, the chorus, the verse, the everything.

Now listening to this song, on constant repetition, I feel comfortable, calm and certain everything is in its right place.
My mother, the band’s loyal fan, would patiently sing this to me every time I wished to hear the melody. Slowly rocking me back and forth in her arms. I remember her scent, the texture of her arms, and her cool breathy voice whispering into my ear. I remember the sensation of feeling perfectly safe. I remember the simple feeling of life being perfectly in its place. The simplicity of childhood, of family, of pure love.
I cannot listen to this song without thinking of this kindness, this pure simple loving kindness. It takes me back, not to a childish era, but that of a refined and easy life. The life of a mother just loving her daughter. The life of a daughter perfectly happy with a mother’s love, nothing else.
If only life could be this easy. If only I could be as comfortable, calm and certain all the time. If only I could have my mother slowly rock me back and forth breathing love into my ear. If only I could time travel.
But what if? Why not? How come?
I believe it could happen. Why not? Anything is possible. I can still be a sweet hippie child, cradled in the arms of a mother with nothing to give but love, with nothing of need except love.
Homeward bound I am, wrapped up in the idea of what is ahead. A break of love, kind simple love. A break of comfort, calm and certainness. A break full of a mother, a daughter, a song, and loving arms. A break of the past come back to warm my heart and soothe my mind. Restore my life. Repair my heart heavy with burden. Heavy from lack of simple love.